Imagine if before their wedding, each and every young Jewish couple who came from a background of little knowledge or connection to their heritage, had an opportunity to learn about Judaism and in particular about what it had to teach about marriage and relationships. Imagine Jews from a non-religious background having the opportunity to meet their fellow Jewish brothers and sisters who come from a religious background. Making a connection with them and engaging in several deep, personal and interesting discussions about life, love, religion and anything and everything in between. What an opportunity for Jewish Unity, Jewish Learning, and Jewish Appreciation.
Now, imagine, this is not a dream but a reality. And it’s actually a required ‘rite of passage’ for every young secular couple getting married in Israel. Amazing, right
Lahav is a non-profit organization started in 2004 dedicated to teaching Israeli couples what Torah and Judaism can offer their lives, in particular their marriage and family. Simultaneously, we are trying to prevent the damage being done by an archaic system which has been turning off tens of thousands of young Jewish couples in Israel from Judaism each and every year.
Each year approximately 25,000 secular couples (50,000 people) get married in Israel. BY LAW, EVERY ONE OF THEM MUST ATTEND A RABBANUT CLASS ON TAHARAS MISHPACHA. If not, they WILL NOT RECEIVE A MARRIAGE LICENSE. They literally must knock on our doors!
Unfortunately, before LAHAV, due to this law these young secular Jews have been turned off from their heritage en masse! The Rabbanut classes -- given impersonally to large groups, at inconvenient times and in uncomfortable settings, only add insult to the injury. The couples are talked down to, they feel judged and disrespected. This negative experience only proves to them that their many misconceptions of religion and feelings of distrust about religious Jews are accurate, For many, this is the first and probably last time they will have anything to do with religion or religious people. Once traumatized and turned off, possibly for life, how will we get them back?! How many have already been lost in the past 60+ years?
Making things even worse, this Chilul HaShem is happening at a critical juncture in their lives when couples on the verge of marriage are OPEN to their heritage and thinking about family, community and religion. Sadly, these Rabbanut classes create an even greater rift between religious and secular Jews in Israel and an almost irreparable alienation from Judaism. Overall, the opportunity to reach out and provide 50,000 secular Jews with a positive and impactful Jewish learning encounter is lost every year -- not a dream opportunity but an existing reality happening every day. CLICK HERE TO READ ABOUT HOW LAHAV IS CHANGING THIS!
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Lahav has embarked on the biggest outreach and Taharas Mishpacha initiative ever in Israel. We make agreements with the local Rabbanut, whereby ALL THE COUPLES getting married in that city are sent exclusively to Lahav to receive their mandatory classes for an experience that will change their lives. The beauty of our model is that everyone must knock on our door! Yes! Every person who wants to get married in Israel -- lawyers or doctors, bankers or bakers, students or politicians -- must come to Lahav to learn.
In our beautiful and inviting centers, young couples learn with their personal teachers, in a private and respectful setting at a time convenient for them. Lahav’s 500 + teachers, in addition to their tremendous Ahavas Yisrael, have all taken our intense Kiruv training courses. Lahav teachers illustrate the beauty and wisdom behind the mitzvah, revealing its relevance and showing how it can enrich their marriage, all in language the couple can relate to.
Couples treated with dignity and patience actually enjoy the classes! Feeling comfortable in a non-judgmental environment leads them to ask many other questions they may have had about Judaism but were embarrassed to ask. Lahav’s thought-provoking material offers a new perspective on a world they never knew before, causing the couples to realize that Judaism is very different from what they thought. Their feedback to this new discovery, in their own words is that they “feel closer than ever before to their heritage” and they “want to keep learning in the future”! Link to “in their own words”
Lahav succeeds on so many levels - creating Jewish Unity and Ahavas Yisrael, changing negative misconceptions and helping young Jewish couples create strong families based on healthy relationships. Moreover, we facilitate their bond with Torah and increase in Mitzvah observance which turns this positive religious experience into an opportunity to participate in other outreach events so the journey of growth can continue! Link to “our success/stats”
We have, IN OUR HANDS, the ability to reach the ENTIRE next generation of Israeli families over a 20 year period - 50,000 X 20 years is ONE MILLION PEOPLE!
Add in GLOW, giving LIGHT, chasing away darkness and division…..
Lahav means “a flame”, it gives warmth, light and creates a spark!
The challenge and opportunity
Over 20,000 non-observant Jewish couples get married each year in Israel. Mazal Tov! J
By law, every one of them must attend a government class on the Jewish Family laws, if they don’t, they will not receive a marriage license. Religious coercion at its finest, BUT YET… a unique opportunity for learning, growth, unity and connection. UNFORTUNATELY, this dry, unpleasant and many times demeaning ‘experience’ scars and turns off these young couples from their heritage! Many leave more anti-religious than before they came in! What a waste of the potential of this special moment.
Opportunity/Challenge - there is a little known law in Israel that actually forces tens of thousands of secular couples every year to take a class on Taharas Mishpacha before they can get a marriage license. Sounds wonderful, right? All these secular couples coming to us, what an opportunity for kiruv and achdus! Unfortunately, the dry and sometimes demeaning ‘experience’ provided by this required government class turns off untold amounts of these young secular couples. Many leave more anti-religious than before they came in! How sad to waste this golden opportunity!!
Solution/Implementation - LAHAV makes agreements with cities throughout Israel to take over this whole teaching process. In a respectful and non-judgmental atmosphere, we provide personal, one on one meetings with trained kiruv professionals in place of the government group class. Beyond the halachic content, our teachers give strong emphasis to the hashkafa behind the Mitzvah, sharing its wisdom, relevance and beauty, and it’s over several meetings (not just one class like the government), giving the couples the opportunity to discuss any questions or misconceptions they may have. The couples see how meaningful their heritage is and what a foundation of Jewish values can offer their marriage and family. We teach over 3,000 couples a year. Couples who have little to no background will now have a personal, powerful and positive Jewish experience that will change the course of their lives. Building on the connections made during these meetings, the teachers and couples keep in touch even after the wedding for follow up and continued growth.
Over 20,000 non-observant Jewish couples get married every year in Israel. Mazal Tov!
By law, each couple must attend a government class on the Jewish Family laws, if they don’t, they will NOT receive a marriage license. Religious coercion at its finest, BUT YET… a unique opportunity for learning, growth, unity and connection. UNFORTUNATELY, this government ‘experience’ is many times dry, unpleasant and demeaning which scars and turns off these young couples from their heritage! Many leave more anti-religious than before they came in! What a tragedy.
The potential of this special moment and time is wasted. (maybe have this as a blurb)
LAHAV makes agreements with cities throughout Israel to take over this whole teaching process. In a respectful and non-judgmental atmosphere, we provide personal, one on one meetings with trained kiruv professionals in place of the government group class. Beyond the halachic content, our teachers give strong emphasis to the hashkafa behind the Mitzvah, sharing its wisdom, relevance and beauty, and it’s over several meetings (not just one class like the government), giving the couples the opportunity to discuss any questions or misconceptions they may have. The couples see how meaningful their heritage is and what a foundation of Jewish values can offer their marriage and family.
Blurb for this part - - COUPLES WHO HAVE LITTLE TO NO BACKGROUND WILL HAVE a personal, powerful and positive Jewish experience that will change their lives.
Every year approximately 20,000 secular couples get married in Israel. Every single one of them is required, by law, to take a class in Taharas Mishpacha in order to get a marriage license. Unfortunately, for decades, after going through this government ‘experience’, the couples left more anti-religious than before they came in! What a tragedy and wasted opportunity!
Lahav utilizes this unrealized potential, by making agreements with the government to take over these classes. We set the couples up to learn on one one with amazing kiruv professionals. Couples with little to no background are having a personal, powerful and positive Jewish experience that is changing the course of their lives. And we’re doing it in the thousands each year!
The potential of this special moment and time is wasted.
Lahav currently teaches over 3,000 secular couples each year through our personal, one on one classes!
By taking over these Rabbanut mandated classes, (by making an agreement to provide these classes in place of the Rabbanut) we are providing these couples with a once in a lifetime positive experience that dramatically increases their understanding and appreciation of their religion and heritage.
Lahav teams each Kallah up with her own personal teacher, who is trained to teach Taharas Hamishpacha in a way that shows the bride the beauty and wisdom of the Mitzvah and how it can enhance her marriage. Each class runs for close to two hours and every Kallah can have as many meetings as she wants. It goes without saying that Lahav teachers have tremendous Ahavas Yisrael and are totally accepting and non-judgmental. Additionally, the classes are given using examples the couple can related to and in language they can understand. This relevance and openness encourages the couples to ask any other questions that they may have on their mind, regarding Judaism or about marriage in general.
At our beautiful centers the couples are able to learn in a warm, private, and respectful setting. The teachers give each bride all the time and attention that she deserves and creates a personal bond. This bond is facilitated by the fact that the Kallah's background, education, and language are all taken into account to match her up with the most compatible Lahav teacher. The Chatanim are included as well.
Enhancing these encounters is the fact that our centers are open from 9 in the morning till 10 at night, allowing the Kallot and Chatanim to schedule their classes at times convenient for them, when they can relax and actually enjoy this personal experience. All of Lahav’s pre-marital classes are provided free of charge, regardless of how many meetings the couple desires.
All of this a welcome change to what had existed at the Rabbanut previously and still exists in many cities! Rabbanut teachers lacking basic training and sensitivity who are talking down to the couples, giving over the material in an impersonal manner, telling them they will burn in gehenom or worse! Adding insult to injury is that the classes are given to large groups of women together, at inconvenient times, in uncomfortable settings and in an inadequate timeframe for the material. For many this is the first and possibly last time they will have anything to do with religion or religious people, they have been traumatized and turned off, possibly for life! The overwhelming majority of these couples walk away from these Rabbanut classes feeling that they were a waste of their or even worse, had an extremely negative experience. This sad result at the Rabbanut leaves the couples walking out in a way that deepen the division between Jews.
In contrast, from the moment the young couples enter Lahav’s beautiful and comfortable surroundings they encounter the warmth and sensitivity of its staff and the Hadracha process. This leaves them with the indelible impression that Judaism is actually very different from what they thought. The success rate is phenomenal, with many Kallot voluntarily returning for more classes than are required! After learning with Lahav, the majority of couples express their intention to keep the mitzvah of Taharat Hamishpacha, in addition to an enthusiastic interest in learning more about Judaism! Read more in “Our Success”.
Lahav’s contact with the couples continues even after their wedding! As part of a telephone survey conducted by Lahav where we receive valuable feedback from their experience with us, the couples are asked if and how they would be interested in continuing the learning/connection. And if yes, what interests them particularly.
The feedback and response has been phenomenal! In large part this is due to how comfortable the couples felt during their time learning with Lahav. These good feelings encourage the couples interest in learning more about Judaism! They are invited to take part in all manner of learning opportunities to continue their growth. Different options include chavrusa on the telephone, lectures, weekend retreats, workshops, activities and tours. The topics of learning are just as varied, whether interested in “chinuch banim”, “self actualization through Torah”, weekly Parsha or Chagim, etc, etc. There is something for everyone!
The couples trust that an event with Lahav will be a positive experience and are open to taking part! Indeed, many of the couples comment that this experience has left them with the indelible impression that the Lahav teachers want THEM to succeed. There are no ulterior motives, no cash gain, no political slant, only the desire to help THEM have a great marriage and to successfully build a healthy family based on Torah values.
Lahav also works together with many other outreach organizations throughout the country and strives to set up the Lahav coupes with these organizations. The organizations include Shishi Mishpachti, Kesher Yehudi, Ayelet Hasachar, Lev L’Achim, Shorashim, Mifgashim, Aish HaTorah, and Shamayim to name only a few! Lahav makes sure that the organization continuing the connection with these couples does not drop the ball, they are required to give Lahav constant updates on how the couple is doing. Lahav has been successful at sending/introducing/pairing thousands of young couples to outreach organizations and centers around the country. Young couples, who before learning with Lahav WOULD NEVER HAVE IMAGINED walking into one of these centers, are now doing so and taking part in the learning programs! It only happened due to Lahav!